12:46 a.m. | 2004-08-31
Wasn't Such An Imposition
I made a mistake.
He asked me what my plans were for the night, and even though I have work at 5 I said, "I could spare a few moments."
He told me he wanted dessert. When I asked him what kind he jokingly said..."you." We went to IHOP and he had his apple crisp. He said thank you when I put my credit card out. And the entire dinner he kept singing songs like, "come home and, turn me on." Or winking at me. Or making gestures in his typical fashion.
I knew it was too soon to test myself, and I know I shouldn't have said yes. And I was so eager to say yes at that.
Yet I won. I had a snack, I saw him, I gave him a hug, and nothing more. I didn't want anything more. As much as he suggested that we should be doing more, or when he rubbed his leg on mine...I didn't feel the need to do anything. I simply pulled back and smiled.
I am satisfied. And I am tired. And I'm going to get approximately 3 hours of sleep. I don't care, though, I tested myself and I won. I won dammit.
