late nights and loud fights
it's all just a blur

7:22 p.m. | 2005-07-06
They Said 3-5 Days, It Has Been 4

Only at a point where I'm this desperate in life would I actually go back to Gabe.

I have faith I can say no, but at the same time I want to say yes. I know nothing will happen because both he nor I won't let it (I know, Gabe, all grown up? I was shocked too).

But it's just that things haven't gotten any better. I was sitting at a light today listening to NPR (as I've grown accustomed to) and they said something something army corporal and I just started to tear up. Even thinking about it now I start to cry. It wasn't the subject matter, it wasn't the mood, it wasn't anything but the situations I've put myself in for the last week.

Social obligations (not the fun kind), auto body shops, listening to soft indie-rock, talking about the future.

Like I said, only in a place this desperate and vulnerable.

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