11:59 p.m. | 2003-07-24
It's like anger, and excitement, all in one, ewww
I'm not gonna say I'm worried, but then again I'm not completely sure about it either. Gabe disapeared last night after I said I was avoiding his mother, then he came on and I asked him this "hey, not to bother you, but I thought I'd find out 1) if you were ok, and 2) if I offended you last night." And what comes next boys and girls? Silence. That's right, avoidance, utter avoidance. Am I at the point now where I'm allowed to be upset? I'd rather like it if someone clarified that for me.
But so, yeah, I wanted some kicks and giggles tonight, but less than I wanted to be with him last night. Tonight I was just more, upset. And that's weird for me, it's like a new emotion.
I thought I'd make a mention, to librtine, because I was feeling nice and like not making him work, so if he happens to read my diary, yay for him. To clarify:
I'm 17 years old until this August 20th. I'm female, yay for feminism, wait, no I remember I'm the girl who thinks feminism is bull crap, that's right. And I'm headed off to Northeastern University in Boston. It's a pretty good school, but more than that, I think it fits me better, it's my kind of town and people and program. I'm right now getting an architecture scholarship, though, is architecture what I want to do? Lord knows. I mean really, I have no clue. And the kicker is, I need to decide by freshman year. Oh well, I'll deal.
So, that's the low down as far as college goes, darling. I graduated high school this May, obviously, with an IB diploma, that crazy English AP like program but admittedly WAY harder. And, I did pretty well, so I guess you could say my love of Dostoevsky and Hobbes, and loathing of Kant, comes from that. A good education perhaps. Or maybe it was my incredibly supportive childhood. Damn, sarcasm just makes me sad. Oh well, I deal, and that's cool. So, yeah, that's basically where I stand at the moment, confused as all hell and almost, just almost, upset at Gabe.
Signing Off--Lauren
